Make-A-Gamer-Wish Foundation

What if you had one wish as a gamer? As a hardcore console junkie, you had one chance to make any wish come true? If I had this wish, like if I rubbed a Kinect and Ken Levine materialized in my living room willing to grant me one wish for the next generation of consoles, I know what I’d wish for. Would I wish for the next-gen of consoles to be a dollar? No. Would I wish for 3D graphics? Not a chance. Would I wish that the next XBOX was basically an affordable holodeck? OK, maybe. To stay in the realm of possibility, I would look Ken right in the beard and say, “I wish for no more load screens.”

I know, first-world problems, right? Whiny gamer that I am, I don’t think it is too much to want for the end of load screens. With the world we live in, a world where I can complain about something like this, I don’t think it is unreasonable to ask for a loadless console.

Everything else in the world is instant. When was the last time you waited for a YouTube video to buffer? When was the last time you waited for anything? In today’s world, we want everything now, and I’ll be damned if I don’t want the next level now, too.

It is a ridiculous request. I know consoles are at least 18 months from market, two-plus years even, but I can dream can’t I? I know that both Playstation and XBOX next-gens will run BluRay, there is no denying this next format. There might be 3D ability. There will be wireless connectivity, clouds for saving games, and the consoles will be a full entertainment systems–on demand movies, Netflix, maybe even DVR capabilities–potentially with Move/Kinect capability built-in. They will be incredibly fast and maybe even surf the web as well, but they will most likely come with the quintessential load screen, too.

Not since the annals of gaming history of the cartridge have we had quick gaming. We’ve been sitting through load screens since the disc became the avenue of delivery of content. We wait, and wait, and wait for a level to load. It seems like we are waiting longer and longer with every console.

I don’t think the next generation will be any different. They will build a console, and then games will be shoehorned into discs with so much graphics, cutscenes, and content that we will still have load screens. Even though technology in consoles will be about a decade better, game developers will still find a way to have more content than the console can process quickly. You’ll still have time to get another Mountain Dew and warm up a Hot Pocket.

One can still dream and wish on the spectral wish-granting form of the Great Levine that we can get a console so advanced that I don’t have time to piss or get another snack or drink. It seems that games are just more content heavy than the console can handle these days, and with the next generation I don’t think this is a priority. We have unfortunately been conditioned that loading is necessary. With this next generation, they’ll be able to skimp on guts to keep the price down and appeal to a wider market that includes–shudder–“casual gamers.” It’s a dream the calls a pipe “home”; gaming so fluid that we forget there’s even a disc in the machine. Oh, that reminds me, if I had a second wish…

If you had a wish as a gamer, what would you wish for? Leave your wish in the comments.

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